*You have to vacuum out your washing machine on a regular basis. From laundering all the towels you use to dry off wet baby goats, obviously.
*You find yourself asking loved ones "Does this poop smell funny to you?" presented with an offering of a sample of the suspicious material.
*Alternately, you may hold a kid's back end up to their nose while asking a similar question.
(Side note: it is so WEIRD to me how important the consistency/smell/color of poop is in goat keeping, especially considering I grew up in a family that basically pretended bodily functions and fluids were myths not to be mentioned/acknowledged. Ever.)
*The amount of time you have to consume your first cup of coffee/breakfast is determined by how long it takes to warm up milk for bottle babies.
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*Towels often go directly from the dryer -> use -> back to washing machine without being folded, because that's how quickly they'll be used again.
*Clothes often follow the same pattern because you can only wear shirts and pants from a messy birthing for so long before hypothermia sets in.
*You find yourself creeping around the house first thing in the morning because if you make a floor board creak, the bottle babies will realize you are awake and start screaming for you to feed them NOW. (Not too bad with ten to fifteen bottle babies, but we rarely have that few).
*Acne revisits parts of your face because baby goats will take a rubber nipple more easily the first few times if they can mouth your chin/nose/cheeks first. Apparently, a mixture of colostrum and baby goat spit is not meant to be applied as a tonic.
*All activities are scheduled around when bottle feedings need to be done. Which means few activities are scheduled off the farm. In fact, you are surprised by how much seasonal change has happened since the last time you left the property when you finally have to go into town.
*Empty feed bags aren't thrown away, but set aside as "barn laundry bags".
*Your daily outfit is determined by how many stains you think are possible that day, and by how willing you are to get more bleach stains on that particular piece of clothing.
*You find yourself so tired that even microwaving a meal feels too much like cooking which feels like work, so...cheese and crackers is a well rounded meal right? Eh, I'll have to wash the knife and cutting board...cereal straight from the box it is!
*Getting a shower in feels like a minor victory. Notice I didn't mention how often you are getting that shower.
We are currently at light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel time, where we only have a few more does left to kid, which means that at least there will stop being an ever-increasing number of mouths to feed, and the goat population will start to go on a downward trend as kids head off to their new homes.
